Spider Dad

We no longer have two baby girls, we have two little girls, They walk, they talk they experiment with our patience. m is already remembering the alphabet and the numbers 1 and 2. If you talk to them about something from a few days ago, they remember it, down to the sound effects. Z can still impersonate the ocean and the cold wind from when we went to Bodega Bay. It was the second time at the beach during Thanksgiving weekend, We ate Thanksgivings at Pacifica and walked on the beach after dinner. the girls were all gussied up in little dresses and I managed to slick their wild hair down. Boy did grandma hate that. She took z into the bathroom (we let them go potty with females to inspire them). When they came out, lo and behold, z's hair was all puffy, like grandma had completely undid my work. I thought it was funny and never said anything, As long as Grandma is helping with child care, she can give them mohawks.

On my way to work, while walking from the station, There came the sound of a fire truck and a police car coming my way. This is not unusual so I ignored them. As long as it wasn't another explosion (see "Ka-Boom" blog entry). When a police car passed by me, I started to fantasize, what if I were Spider Man? I looked at the building next to me and imagined secretly scooting up the wall, changing into my costume. I then wondered which would I follow? The fire truck or the police car. When another cop car did an illegal u-turn in front of me and another rushed past I figured Spiderman may be needed where the police are going. Besides, Fireman don't need no costumed freak getting in their way. The more I walked toward work the more police cars I saw going left and right. I round the corner and am passing by this fenced in garage/gas station and I see this Black guy about 20 feet away, pacing around and thinking. Nothing out of the ordinary. Suddenly about 10 cop cars converge around me . A copper jumps out and says into his radio: " We got him. Gas station on 16th!" Er-ah wait a minute, I think, That's me? I look around for whoever they could be talking about. Surely not the solemn Black guy? He's not even attempting to run away. I step to the side and freeze. I imagine If it is the Black guy, and I try to make a run for it when he starts shooting, a late comer cop will just open up on me because I looked guilty with the running away from the bullets and all. About 10 cops run around, looking for a way to get into the fenced in area. One Einstein tries to climb over the fence, a barbed wire fence! He doesn't get very far, He manages to get one leg up and kinda hangs there for a few minute. Meanwhile his comrades find the entrance and rush in and tackle the guy, who never puts up a struggle. Obviously although he's what I guess is a recent murderer suspect, He knows the rule as Chris Rock says: "If the cops have to chase after you, they're bringing an ass whooping with them." Eventually, T.J Hooker, gets off the barb wire and climbs down. The only saving grace for him is he didn't rip his pants. Can you imagine? He's already gonna get ripped for trying to climb the fence: "Hey Joe, maybe we should call you Bob Wire! Har-har" they'll say in the locker room.
The interesting thing is, If I were Spiderman, I totally could have got that guy with one web shot and a hanging from a streetlight. But then I would have been late for my Job. A job that sucks, a job which wouldn't care or understand even if the head boss knew my secret: "Well sure you saved the Mayor from The Lizard man, but your proofs are late. What am I gonna tell the customers?"

I kinda feel like that's what it's like being a parent. Sure you swing in and get your kids picked up on time, make a great dinner that they love, have a great play time, they go to bed on time, happy and content and sleep trough the night. But your stupid ass job bitches at you because some fucking customer, didn't get their job, although they waited until the last moment and want it before they go skiing at Tahoe. So Spiderman has a choice, stop saving the world or let their bosses take their 2 hour lunches and go home on time without worry.

Hmmm. Which one, which one?

That's it
EM